MURPHY'S LAWS of JUSTICE

-- If it's logical, rational, reasonable, and 
   makes good sense, it's not done.

-- If you outsmart your lawyer, you've got the 
   wrong lawyer.

-- When comes the revolution, things will be 
   different -- not better, just different.

-- If you want to make people angry, lie.  
   If you want to make them absolutely  
   livid with rage, tell them the truth.

-- There are two periods when Congress does 
   no business; one is before the holidays, 
   and the other after.

-- When you see the word "net" in a contract, 
   it means "nothing."

-- It'll save you a lot of time if before 
   entering the court you get a look at  
   the jury.

-- If the government hasn't taxed, licensed, 
   or regulated it, it probably isn't  
   worth anything.

-- In crises that force people to choose 
   among alternative courses of action,  
   most people will choose the worst one possible.

-- The law in its majestic equality, forbids 
   the rich as well as the poor to sleep under 
   bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal 
   bread.

-- If there is no way to delay an important 
   decision, the good bureaucracy, public or 
   private, will find it.

-- No man's life, liberty or property are 
   safe while the legislature is in session.

-- The number of people in any working group 
   tends to increase regardless of the  
   amount of work to be done.

-- Never argue with a fool -- people might 
   not know the difference.

-- Where you stand depends on where you sit.

-- Men and nations will act rationally when 
   all other possibilities have been  
   exhausted.

-- Among economists, the real world is often 
   a special case.

-- Government corruption is always reported 
   in the past tense.

-- Those who like sausage or political policy 
   should not watch it being made.

-- Any law enacted with more than fifty words 
   contains at least one loophole.

-- Those who can't teach -- administrate.  
   Those who can't administrate -- run  
   for office.

-- The organization of any bureaucracy is 
   very much like a septic tank -- the  
   really big chunks always rise to the top.

-- If the facts are against you, argue the 
   law.  If the law is against you, pound  
   the table and yell like hell.

-- When attempting to predict and forecast 
   macroeconomic moves of economic  
   legislation by a politician, never be 
   misled by what he says;  instead --  
   watch what he does.

-- In any organization there are only two 
   people to contact if you want results --  
   the person at the very top and the person 
   at the very bottom.

-- If "pro" is the opposite of "con", then 
   "Progress" is the opposite of "Congress."

-- The lord giveth, the government taketh away.

-- The side that wins is not always the best side.